


Different Now

by quiet__tiger



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Smallville
Genre: Amnesia, Anal Sex, First Time sort of, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-10-19 16:40:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10643883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quiet__tiger/pseuds/quiet__tiger
Summary: An accident puts strain on Bruce and Lex's relationship, but they try to work through it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Possibly triggery.
> 
> Originally posted to Livejournal 6-25-06.

Bruce Wayne, a junior at Excelsior Prep, watched as his roommate, Lex Luthor, wandered around their room, touching stuff as if he’d never seen any of it before. Of course, as far as he knew, he hadn’t.

Three days ago Lex had been in a nasty car accident; a drunk driver t-boned him at an intersection as Lex was driving back to school from a late movie, the drunk either ignoring or not seeing the red light. Bruce was supposed to have gone to the movie with him, but he had been given a difficult lab to do for chemistry and not much time to do it, so he had stayed home to work on it and get to bed a little early. It was the last time he’d ever leave Lex alone, if he had any say in it.

Lex hadn’t broken any bones and his internal bleeding was stopped before too much damage had been done, but he was suffering from a horrendous form of retrograde traumatic amnesia. Though wearing his seatbelt, Lex got knocked around, his head injured to the point that Lex didn’t remember who he was.

It hurt Bruce to watch Lex pick up pictures he’d seen hundreds of times before and scan them blankly. When Lex didn’t seem to recognize the photo of him with his mother, Bruce’s heart broke a little.

“Lex.” Blank blue eyes turned to him, Lex’s face impassive. “You want to get something to eat?”

Lex shrugged. “I guess. Nothing else to do until I start to remember stuff.”

“It’ll come back to you, soon enough.” Lex seemed to have lost everything, his name, his past, and even some of his mannerisms. He probably shouldn’t even be at school, but his father was on some sort of important business trip abroad, and Lex didn’t have anywhere else to go other than back to school. Bruce knew it would be a lot of work, but he’d get Lex to remember everything. His name, his past. His boyfriend, Bruce.

~*~*~*~

Bruce watched as Lex got ready for bed, the bathroom down the hall from their room empty except for them. Lex brushed his teeth for longer than normal, and didn’t use the face wash he had used regularly before the accident. It was disconcerting.

But nowhere near as disconcerting as the fact that Lex didn’t remember that he and Bruce slept together.

Bruce had lain down in his own bed first, hoping that Lex would know that he was welcome and pretty much expected to join him. But Lex just got into his own bed and rolled onto his side to face the wall. Bruce wondered if he should say anything, or offer to get into bed with Lex, but he decided against it. Clearly he and Lex were going to be separated for a while, because Lex obviously had no idea that they were a couple, that Bruce had pulled strings to get them a room together, that whoever had to get ready for bed first decided which bed they slept in together.

Bruce lay on his side, facing Lex across the seemingly wider-than-normal space between their beds, and tried to relax. Tried not to panic, that his best friend and lover didn’t remember who he was. It took hours of meditation for him to finally fall asleep.

~*~*~*~

Over the next week it became obvious that while Lex couldn’t remember anything about himself, he was fine when it came to schoolwork and extracurricular activities. He did well on a quiz, wrote an essay, and fenced without losing too much of a step.

It was strange for Bruce to watch Lex regain some of his life. A quirk of his lips here, a widening of his eyes there as he clearly remembered things. And yet Lex didn’t really have a grasp on anything related to him.

Bruce broached the topic one day while Lex was reading a comic book. “Lex.”

Blue eyes looked up into his. Not really sure if there was in invitation in them or not, Bruce decided he didn’t care. He sat down next to Lex on his bed, and gently plucked the comic out of Lex’s fine-boned hands. “What, Bruce?”

“What do you remember about me?”

Lex frowned as if he were thinking. “You’re smart. You’re in good shape. Your parents… were murdered. You’re sort of weird, and dark.”

“You could have learned any of that in the last week.”

“No, I think I remember that. What I did learn in the last week is that you stare at me. A lot. When you think I’m not looking.”

“That’s because…” Bruce took a deep breath. “You and I have. Um.” Was there a tactful way to say ‘been fucking like bunnies for the last year and a half’? 

“Um.”

“I’ve been able to tell that you aren’t loquacious, but usually you’re much more eloquent than you’re being right now.” Lex’s mouth was turned up, but his eyes weren’t smiling.

“I know.” Bruce breathed deeply again, still not sure what to say. All he knew was that he wanted his boyfriend back. “You and I. We. Ah.”

A light went on in Lex’s eyes. “Are you and I a ‘we’?”

Bruce exhaled heavily in relief. “Yes.”

“I was beginning to think we were. I feel funny around you.”

“Funny?” Bruce didn’t think anything about himself was funny.

“Tingly funny. My body must be remembering that it likes being near yours.”

“But you still don’t remember anything.”

“No.” Pale eyes scanned over Bruce. “I don’t remember ever dating or having sex. We have, right? Just based on the lifestyle we have here, and comments people have made... I just ignored them.”

Bruce nodded and explained, “Almost every day.” Just having to say the words made Bruce a bit more melancholy. He picked at the cuff of his sweater, avoiding looking Lex in the eyes again.

“I’m sorry. That I don’t remember.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“No. But I can see that it’s hurting you.”

“Well, yes. You mean so much to me, and you don’t remember how much I meant to you.” Bruce hadn’t cried in a long time, but confessing how much he missed Lex wasn’t helping his emotions. He _hurt_ inside, Lex’s confused stare exacerbating the feeling.

“I don’t know what to say.” Lex looked away, and Bruce’s attention was drawn to his throat, Lex’s Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed.

“There’s nothing to say. Either you’ll start to remember more, or you won’t. You’ll remember how good we were together, or you’ll find someone else. 

That’s it.”

Lex turned back to him. “Or maybe in this state I’m asexual, content in not being with anyone.”

Bruce had to smile. “I doubt it. You’ve been horny as hell since you were fourteen. Let’s just say I wasn’t your first.”

“Really?” Lex looked at him with interest. “Who was?”

“Jeremy Dixon. You were feeling particularly low, and he made you feel better. You then slept around, until we found each other. And. You were content. With me.”

Lex grinned at him. “Seventeen, and already a settled man.”

“We weren’t that bad. We just clicked well.” And will again, Bruce hoped feverishly.

“Well, I.” Lex ran a hand over his head. “Maybe we will again. Just give me some time to process all this, okay?”

“Yeah. Sure.” Bruce hated his life. “I need to head to the library anyway.”

Lex smirked. “I didn’t mean you had to leave. I can think perfectly well with you around.”

Bruce could remember a time, not long ago at all, when even that wasn’t true. He remembered a horny, practically crazed Lex who jumped him and fucked him against the bed just because Bruce had come back from the pool wearing his trunks and a towel around his neck. Bruce used to consume Lex’s thoughts, and Bruce knew it, even if Lex never actually articulated it. The look in Lex’s eyes, his contented sighs, the way Lex melted against him…

Bruce wanted his Lex back. But there wasn’t anything he could do. “I still need to get some books. I’ll be back in a bit.”

Lex gave him a weird little smile as he left the room, and Bruce wondered what on earth that could mean.

~*~*~*~

Days later, Lex propositioned Bruce as Bruce was trying to figure out the best way to explain the successes and failures of ancient Roman government. In five to seven pages. Lex came up behind Bruce, who was sitting at his desk, and put his hands on his shoulders and ordered, “Kiss me.”

Bruce spun around slowly, knowing he heard Lex properly. “Excuse me?”

“Ever since you told me we were together, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I want to see if I still feel the chemistry between us.” Lex’s expression clearly said, ‘I challenge you.’

Bruce could work with that. “An experiment, shall we say?” He stood so that he could look at Lex from eye-level.

“If you could humor me, yes.”

While that was probably the least romantic set up for kissing ever, it didn’t much matter because Bruce and Lex had never really been about romance, and because Bruce was starving for Lex’s affection, Lex’s touch. “Okay.” Bruce leaned down slightly, closed his eyes, and pressed his lips to Lex’s.

It was the same as it had always been, and yet totally different. It was like kissing Lex for the very first time all over again. There was hesitation and awkwardness and a feeling that things just weren’t right, even though Lex tasted and felt the same. Lex swiped his tongue behind Bruce’s teeth in a way he never had before, and Lex seemed wary of even _touching_ Bruce, let alone pushing up his shirt like the old Lex would have done.

After a few minutes, Lex pulled back. Bruce was pleased at the way Lex’s cheeks were flushed and his eyes were dark. Obviously, there was still chemistry there. Lex wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, and Bruce fought his frown. “That was. Something, Bruce.”

Bruce did frown, frustrated that Lex apparently didn’t want to just jump into bed with him. Bruce had excellent control over his body and physical needs, but the change from constant sex to no sex at all was difficult. “That’s it?”

“For now.”

“What does that mean?” Even the old Lex wasn’t this much of a pain in the ass.

“It means that the experiment has been successful, and I’ve confirmed that I’m attracted to you.”

“And that’s it?” Bruce knew it never paid to show anger, that it was much more fruitful to make people fear you when you’re calm and in control, but he couldn’t help letting his voice rise. “You’ve got nothing else to say? We make out and then that’s it?”

Lex looked worried, his cool exterior melting a bit. “I’m sorry, it’s just I’m still sorting things through, trying to remember who I am. This is difficult.”

“It’s difficult for me, too.” Bruce glared at his roommate and former lover, angry at the other boy but angry with himself as well. “I’m going to work out.” He stormed out of the room and headed to the gym, not caring that he didn’t bring an extra shirt.

He tried not to care about the wounded look on Lex’s pale face when he slammed the door.

~*~*~*~

After the gym, Bruce took a walk. He thought about Lex, and he thought about himself, and he wrote his neglected essay in his head as he pondered. He knew he needed to give Lex a little more slack and that he had no reason to be angry with him. It would be a miracle if Lex ever wanted to even talk to him again after this evening, let alone touch him.

Both frustrated and weary in every sense of the words, Bruce quietly opened the door to their room, expecting Lex to be asleep. Instead, Lex was sitting on Bruce’s bed, reading a book. Without looking up, Lex greeted him. “It’s about time.”

“I was thinking.”

“So I gathered by the way your shirt is still sweaty and you have mud on your shoes.” 

Bruce glanced down, and saw that there were leaves stuck in his shoe laces as well. “I like being outside at night. It clears my head.”

“Once the fog dissipated, did you discover anything good?” Lex finally looked up, and underneath the mask- how did Lex remember his masks?- Bruce was able to detect what he classified as uncertainty.

“Yes.” Bruce sat down next to Lex, shifting so he could face him. “I didn’t mean to get so frustrated before. I just miss you, the Lex I had before. Not that you’re not the same person, but. You know what I mean.”

“That’s a terrible apology.” Lex should know that Bruce never apologized for anything. “But I understand. I just don’t know what I’m feeling. I feel like I’ve known you forever, but I also feel as if we just met. I want to touch you, but I don’t know how you like it. I’m confused, and I hate it.”

Bruce smiled slightly; the old Lex would never have admitted to being so confused. Perhaps there was more to this new Lex that Bruce could like. “What should we do?”

“Sleep together.”

“ _Excuse_ me?”

“Not in the sex way, just the together way.” Lex looked at him and let the mask drop; somehow Bruce was able to detect amusement and apprehension in the remaining expression.

“I…” Bruce wasn’t sure what to say. Who would be taking advantage of whom? Would anyone be taking advantage if they both wanted it? Bruce could handle just holding Lex if it meant they shared a bed again. “I’d like that.” He smiled tentatively, not wanting to seem like either too big of a pansy or too big of a horny doofus. Not that Bruce would ever admit to ever being a doofus about anything.

“Good.” Bruce then realized that Lex was already in his pajamas, the dark blue t-shirt and the gray sleep pants. “Let me just finish this chapter.”

“I need to shower, anyway.” Bruce got up and grabbed his shower gear, then went down the hall. Not only did he shower, he masturbated, not trusting his body to be close to Lex after all this time.

When he got back, Lex was already lying down, facing his own bed while in Bruce’s. Bruce got in behind him and pulled himself close. He squeezed his arm against Lex’s chest, and breathed deeply to inhale his scent, become reacquainted with him. For the first time since Lex’s accident, Bruce slept soundly and through the night to his alarm.

~*~*~*~

Within a few weeks, it was almost like having the old Lex back. Lex had recovered a lot of his mannerisms, and was better about facts related to himself. He seemed to be more comfortable with Bruce, even though he apparently didn’t remember yet the things they had done together.

Bruce would take it.

He certainly appreciated it when Lex let him get his hands down his pants, jerking Lex off in the way he knew Lex’s body liked. The way Lex smiled at him after he came, lazily and with some bit of wonderment, let Bruce know that Lex didn’t know he liked it. Until now.

“That was good, Bruce.”

“Thanks.” Bruce continued to watch Lex breathe, watch his flush fade. “You act like it was your first time.”

“As far as I know, it was.” His eyes were earnest again, taking in Bruce’s reaction.

Bruce felt dirty. If Lex really meant what he said, then Bruce just stripped him of perceived purity. And he didn’t even _ask_. He had forgotten, somehow, in the heat of sex, that Lex didn’t remember anything. And now he felt horrible, his own erection subsiding. “I’m sorry.”

“For what? It was great.”

“It. It could have been better.” If he had remembered and asked and actually tried to work with this new Lex, let him be more a part of it rather than just letting Bruce do what he was used to doing in the name of getting Lex off.

“Well, it was hot and good and don’t feel bad.” Lex smiled at him, and Bruce could see he was lending his eyes some warmth so Bruce would smile back. So he did, but he didn’t really feel it. Bruce was definitely conflicted when Lex shifted to look at him from a better angle. “Can I try you?”

Lex had _never_ been that innocent, that insecure before. Lex never asked, at least not with words. He prodded, he hinted, he demanded, but he never _asked_. The request was almost kind of sweet, if Bruce allowed himself to consider Lex in that way. He was just so _torn_. He didn’t want to mess with Lex’s head, but he really, really wanted Lex to touch him, but he didn’t want to.

“Come on, Bruce. Why not?”

“Because this is wrong.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.” And he didn’t.

“I want to. I like you, again or still, and I want to return the favor.”

“I didn’t mean to put you in debt.”

“I don’t mind. It means I have something to look forward to.”

“I’m going to go take a walk. I need to think.”

Lex sat up and let his anger show. “First you’re upset I show no interest in you, now you’re upset that I want to touch you? What’s wrong with you?”

Bruce stood and tried to control his temper. “This is all wrong, Lex!”

“Then come back here so we can fix it!”

“I’m going out.”

“Avoiding the problem isn’t going to make it go away.”

“No. But it will give you time to make sure this is what you want, not what you think I want, and it’ll give me time to think through the consequences.”

“Whatever.”

Bruce left Lex lying on his bed and headed to the on-campus convenience store. It was a fairly good walk, and would give him time to think.

He'd had a sort of love-hate relationship with the old Lex, and now the situation was ten times worse. But he still wanted this new Lex, didn't he? He decided he did, but didn't really know what to do about it. He sighed and kept walking, the store behind him.

~*~*~*~

It took a week for Bruce to decide that if Lex wanted to continue their relationship, he did, too. If nothing else, both of them working towards the same goal would help alleviate the tension, sexual and otherwise, that permeated their room.

Bruce entered the room after class on a chilly Friday and stalked right over to Lex, who was lying on his stomach on his bed and writing something in a notebook. Since when did Lex keep a journal? “What’s that?”

“Writing stuff. This way, if I ever lose my memory again, it won’t take so long for it to come back.”

The simple statement made Bruce’s heart ache, and almost made him change his mind. But the way Lex’s pants hung loose on his hips and the way his shoulders stretched his shirt reminded Bruce of what he had lost and could regain. “That’s a good idea.”

“So, what are you doing?”

Honesty was always the best policy, right? Well, no, but it would probably work here. “Trying to think of the best way to tell you that if you’re still willing to continue our relationship, I’m ready when you are.” He swallowed, incredibly unsure.

Lex closed his notebook and sat up, legs dangling over the edge of the bed. “You sure?”

Not particularly. “Yes.”

“Good.” Lex stood and pulled off his sweater.

“You know, foreplay and teasing can be fun.” The way Lex was just offering himself was a bit alarming to Bruce.

“Just moving things along.”

How Lex could be so sure of himself even though this might as well be his first time mystified Bruce. He certainly hadn’t come on this strongly the first time he and Lex had had sex, stripping Bruce of his own virginity. That Bruce had been nervous, apprehensive. This Lex was… giving himself up. “So long as you’re sure.”

Lex peeled off his socks one at a time, fencers’ skills keeping him balanced as he stood. “Are _you_ sure? You don’t look like you want to do this.”

“I do. But…”

“God, Bruce, okay, yes, this is the first time within this memory, but it’s not like this is actually my first time. I’m just sick and tired of you looking at me like I’m fragile, and I want to do this because I want to have sex and remember what it feels like! I want _you_ , but I can just go to someone else, if you’re not up to it.”

Bruce glared. This Lex was still more of an ass than the old Lex at times. “You’re staying right here.”

Lex smirked at him, the self-satisfied ass. “I thought that might change your mind.”

Angry, Bruce pushed Lex backwards onto the bed, his pants unbuttoned. Lex landed on his elbows, looking up at Bruce with an expression that may have been pensive, or maybe fearful, or maybe annoyed. Bruce didn’t care. He wanted his Lex back and if having sex with this Lex would expedite the process, he was happy to do it.

Lex pulled his leg up on the bed, and Bruce dropped on top of him, kissing him fiercely to remind himself of why he needed this, why he needed Lex, why he needed Lex to need him. Bruce wasn’t too ashamed to admit these needs, at least to himself. His body was usually controlled, but now he just wanted to _feel_ without his brain getting in the way. He focused on how Lex _tasted_ and _sounded_ and _looked_ , flushed and hot and much more like the Lex Bruce remembered.

Bruce worried a bruise over Lex’s collarbone, Lex gasping sharply against Bruce’s hair. “Bruce. God. I. Oh, fuck…” Bruce sucked at Lex’s carotid artery, and Lex arched up into him. “So good, Bruce…”

After marking Lex in a couple more places, Lex squirming deliciously against him and panting heavily, Bruce decided that getting the chance to ‘take’ Lex’s virginity was a fantastic opportunity. Lex had taken his, and Bruce had had no chance to be any of Lex’s firsts. Maybe his first love, but Lex had never expressed that as fact; Bruce wasn't sure if Lex was even capable of love. But now, Bruce would be able to have Lex for his ‘first time.’

Granted, his perverse joy may also be that he was about to have sex for the first time in a couple of months.

“God, Bruce, I didn’t…” Bruce looked down into Lex’s eyes; they were dark and a bit wild, and Bruce had barely even _touched_ him yet.

“Okay, Lex?”

“Fuck, yes…” Lex pulled Bruce down by his neck to kiss him hungrily, then he pulled back. “I. I feel like I. I don’t know. I feel like I should know what I’m doing, but I don’t.”

Bruce felt himself grinning. Apparently, unlike with fencing, Lex didn't have enough muscle memory to remember how to do this. “We’ll just have to see if you remember what you like partway through. While I’m fucking you so hard you won’t be able to sit down tomorrow.” Thankfully, because Lex wasn’t _actually_ a virgin, Bruce should be able to get inside and work without too much difficulty. Unless there were psychological obstacles.

Bruce sat back so he could strip off Lex’s slacks and take off his own clothing. He saw Lex’s hands twitch. “You want to touch?”

“Can I?”

“Boxers off or on?”

Lex may have blushed, and he softly said, “On. For now.” Bruce settled onto his back, and Lex propped himself on one hand so he could explore with the other. Lex looked like he wasn’t sure where to go first, and for some reason it really turned Bruce on. He briefly wondered what his actual feelings could have been for the old Lex if he liked certain things about this new one so much more, but he stopped worrying about it when Lex rubbed his hand over Bruce’s stomach.

The touch was tentative and a little damp; Lex didn’t normally have sweaty hands, as far as Bruce knew. Lex dominated for the first time that day, kissing Bruce fiercely as his hand wandered. Bruce wanted to enjoy the foreplay and allow Lex a slow, meaningful first time, but he was too frustrated from the emotional upheaval. He flipped Lex over and took control. “You’re sure, Lex?”

Lex blinked wide eyes at him. “Absolutely. Ever since you told me we used to be together, I’ve just been _feeling_ these things that I don’t think I should, but I like them. I feel… energized around you, and I knew that you were telling the truth about us. And I want it back. I want you.”

Bruce decided to ignore the comment about his honesty and shifted so he could strip off Lex’s boxers. Not even bothering to ask, he sidled down Lex’s pale body and took him in his mouth, making Lex fully hard. Lex bucked into Bruce’s mouth, one hand coming to rest on the back of Bruce’s head, playing with his hair.

Bruce wondered if Lex would reach orgasm quickly, like a guy during his actual first time, or if it would take a while like it usually did when they were together. He stopped worrying about it as he tasted Lex again, not surprised that Lex tasted the same but relieved anyway. Even if Lex didn’t know what he liked, _Bruce_ knew what Lex liked, knew where to touch and stroke and exactly what to do with his tongue. Lex’s hand spasmed in Bruce’s hair as he came, his moan practically one of surprise.

Bruce swallowed, then pulled off and wiped his hand over his mouth. He looked at Lex, whose eyes were half-lidded and his face flushed. “Good?”

Lex groaned. “Yes. Better than I don’t remember.” Bruce chuckled, then got up to grab lube and a condom. He thought about what position would be best for Lex, and what Lex liked, and told him to get on his knees. “But then I can’t see you.”

Perplexed, Bruce asked, “So?”

“I want to remember this as more than you doing me a favor. Look at me.”

“It’s not a favor.”

“Whatever. I want to see you.” Bruce frowned and adjusted his game plan. Sometimes Lex had gone weeks without wanting to see him during sex, but then other times it was as if he wanted to cherish the moment of intimacy. Whatever. He’d give Lex what he wanted this time.

He uncapped the lube and warmed it between his fingers, and made sure Lex was comfortable with one leg over Bruce’s shoulder and the other pushed wide. As he’d hoped, Lex was tight, but not virginal tight, his finger sliding in without too much hassle. Lex moaned a little, Bruce not sure if it was in pleasure or pain. 

“You okay, Lex?”

“Feels weird. But better than I thought it would. Keep going.”

Bruce could definitely do that. Another finger and an unerring stab at Lex’s prostate… Lex trembled underneath him, and he started to breathe more heavily. Bruce worked quickly from there, the actions familiar to him even if they weren’t familiar to Lex. “I’m going to move on, Lex, okay?”

“Please… I. Just go.”

Bruce took that to mean ‘get moving,’ and ripped open and pulled on the condom then lubed himself up. Slow, steady slide _in_ as Lex moaned up at him and twitched his hips. When Bruce was in all the way, he knew he had to ask, “You okay?”

“Fuck, Bruce, yes!” Pissed-off Lex during sex was definitely familiar to Bruce, so he grinned and pulled back. Then rocked forward and… Yeah. This was definitely like coming home for him, too long without his lover around, too long without _this_.

As Bruce continued to move, Lex started to babble, his words hard to make out. When Bruce wrapped his hand around Lex’s cock, Lex’s words stopped, and he only moaned and panted. When he applied his hands and hips to doing what he knew drew Lex _wild_ , “fuck” was the only word that came out of his mouth until he came, shuddering and shaking up against Bruce.

Bruce groaned as Lex panted and recovered, working himself faster and harder, now focusing on his own body. He bent his head so he could see his own dick sliding in and out of Lex, then he felt fingers in his hair again. He looked back up into Lex’s eyes, and the expression he saw on Lex’s face... Bruce squeezed his eyes shut and thrust deeply one more time, coming hard inside Lex, hot waves radiating through his body as he shook.

He slumped on top of Lex, not caring for the moment if Lex couldn’t breathe, and after a couple of minutes he rolled to the side. Lex nudged him with a shoulder. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Can’t believe I forgot how good that was.” The passage of time sometimes made the body stupid; why had he waited to do this?

“Can’t believe I couldn’t remember that.”

“Are you okay? It didn’t hurt, did it?”

“Horrendously painful. See this white stuff on my stomach? Indication of just how torturous it was. Horrible.”

Bruce rolled his eyes. “I meant, did I tear you?”

“No. I’ve done this before, right?”

“Yes.” Probably hundreds of times. In a dozen positions. “But…”

“But it’s sort of my first time and you wanted to be sure.”

“I have a reputation to maintain, after all.”

“Really?”

“No.” Bruce pulled himself away from Lex and sat up. He threw the condom away and rolled his shoulders. He felt good. Really good. Just-got-laid kind of good. And there seemed to be more to it this time, with this new Lex. Bruce wasn't really sure what that meant.

“Thanks, Bruce.”

“Any time.”

“No, I mean for doing this with me even though it’s all fucked and awkward. Things’ll be better now, right?”

Bruce turned to look at Lex. “Yes, I think so.”

~*~*~*~

Over the next few weeks, Lex’s memory came back in bigger and bigger pieces, until he was almost his old self again. Bruce could see him struggling, knowing how he would have reacted to certain things in the past, and how he wanted to react to them now. He was certainly more cautious, more kind, and more understanding.

But he was still an asshole when he wanted to be, which was frustratingly often.

Bruce was able to convince Lex to sleep with him every night, either in the sleeping way or the naked way. One night, as Bruce was wrapped around Lex, Lex wiggled around to look at him. “Me getting my brains scrambled was good for us, wasn’t it?”

Not sure what to say to that, Bruce thought for a minute. “Well. It made you realize you could love. And that you could love me.”

“Yeah.”

“But you’re still a manipulative bastard.”

Lex cocked an eyebrow as his mouth twisted into a wry smile. “That’s much more ingrained than anything else.”

“Somehow, that’s not surprising.”

Lex turned away again and pressed back into Bruce, and Bruce grunted contentedly as he squeezed him tighter. He’d make sure Lex never forgot the important stuff again.


End file.
